I survived - Livre d'Or








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livredor
I survived
Monday, 02 October 2006 at 11:51 pm
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So Yom Kippur was ok. Even good in some aspects. My body has apparently decided that after 15 years problem-free, now is the time to complain about fasting. Actually the major problem was that I couldn't keep food down at all yesterday. I hadn't thrown up in 7 years previously. Which made it not surprising that I felt less than wonderful today; I was likely dehydrated and probably more than usually hungry.

If we have to put up with the very formal style of service with the organ, choir and show-offy operatic cantors, the Great Synagogue carried it off well. The cantors are good, and they were really on form. And they managed to keep the service grounded enough that it felt like a service, not a concert performance. Last night was excessively crowded and hot and I was feeling sick anyway, today was a lot better just from a physical point of view.

The liturgy is from a prayer book that is a few decades old and is very old-school Reform, absolutely cut to the bone. I can live without the piyyutim, the religious poetry, but I'm not so crazy about cutting all the narrative from the Avodah service (the bit that reenacts the Temple sacrifice) and leaving only three repetitions of "Then the High Priest made a confession and pronounced the Divine Name". And I'm definitely not impressed with cutting the remembrance of martyrs altogether. They didn't really replace the removed bits with anything more modern / relevant / inspirational. But the rabbi did read a really lovely piece about the gates of life, daring to open gates to new experiences, accepting that some gates are closed forever, and taking seriously the Prophetic idea about the point of a fast being committing ourselves to feeding the hungry.

But despite the quibbles and despite not feeling physically well, it did work as a whole. The best way I can describe it is a sense of descent, somehow going down into a dark place, a symbolic death if you like, and emerging again lighter. Definitely not my most intellectually engaged year, but that's ok. I'm glad I got to sit with ploni_bat_ploni; she's an inspiration in her visible emotional and spiritual commitment. And she kindly invited me to nap at her place during the break in the afternoon.

After the service we went to the rabbi's to break the fast. That was really pleasant; the rabbi and his wife kept things sensibly informal, and it was a nice way to wind down without being abruptly thrown into normality.

I'd better sleep now or I'll continue to be a wreck tomorrow. I hope everyone who fasted today had a nicer time of it than I did, and that everyone who kept the festival gets all sorts of good conclusions and good writing and all that.

Just to add some content that's not babbling about religion, people should go and read lavendersparkle's essay about feminism and abortion. I like what she has to say, even though I'm not a big fan of claiming that stuff is caused by patriarchy. Am I crazy enough to expand my own thoughts on such a contentious topic? Not sure; I'll decide after I've had some sleep.


Whereaboooots: Stora synagogan, Stockholm, Sweden
Moooood: exanimateexanimate
Tuuuuune: Pretty tune for "Salachti"
Discussion: 4 contributions | Contribute something
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darcydodo: dragon tile
From:darcydodo
Date:October 3rd, 2006 12:01 am (UTC)
1 hours after journal entry, October 2nd, 2006 06:01 pm (darcydodo's time)
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I just know that you once told me that you're not supposed to fast if you're ill.
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livredor: body
From:livredor
Date:October 3rd, 2006 06:10 am (UTC)
7 hours after journal entry, 06:10 am (livredor's time)
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Oh, you're totally not supposed to fast if you're ill, in fact, you're not allowed to. I'm not sure I made the right call; on Sunday night I was throwing up, so I continued drinking water even after the fast had started. Then I went to shul and felt pretty miserable, but not eating for three hours is not exactly fasting. I decided that if I still felt sick in the morning I'd at least drink if not actually eat, but as it turned out I just felt excessively tired, not really nauseous any more. Once I was in shul it would have been really inconvenient to eat; I would have done if I'd felt really sick, but just a vague worry that I might be sick wasn't enough to motivate me to bother with the hassle. But you do have a point, it's highly possible that I should have eaten yesterday.
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From:curious_reader
Date:October 3rd, 2006 10:31 am (UTC)
12 hours after journal entry
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I did not fast the last year. I was not healthy either. I know you should not fast when you are not well. I fasted this year and was well. When I had a bad cold I suffered because I was dehydrated as well but not in particular hungry. I was much better when I broke it with tea when Yom Kippur was over. They always have some snacks in Yakar. Lethargic_man was the ill one this year. He was not as sick as you were but he should not have fasted. He had a flue for over a week and still has it. I was worried about him and always looked over the other side. Yakar is independant Orthodox and has a mechitza which is quite low and has a whole pattern. You can see people easily. In Assif I would have been able to take care of him directly by standing besides him. All his brothers were there. I was not sure if they actually cared very much about him.
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From:ploni_bat_ploni
Date:October 4th, 2006 12:24 am (UTC)
1 days after journal entry
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Dear Livredor,

I hope you have fully recovered. I blogged YK on my blog, in case you're interested.

Thank you for your kind words, as always. But you are more than welcome - as always! Thanks for being a friend.

Hope to see you soon.
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