Not ready - Livre d'Or

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Not ready
Friday, 21 September 2007 at 06:05 pm

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My friends list is full of posts by people who don't feel ready for Yom Kippur. I can very much add my voice to that chorus. If I were feeling homiletic, I could ask whether one can ever be ready. But the truth is all I can do is come back to the Yehuda Amichai poem I taught last week:
The smoke rising from the convent of the silent nuns
Is all I have to say.
This year winter will come late
When we're ready for its coming
And we won't be.

I'm tired. And curse the three Great Religions
Which won't let me sleep at night
What with bells and howls of muezzins and loud shofars and noisy atonements.
Oh God, close your houses, let the world rest.
Why hast thou not forsaken me?...
I don't feel in the least spiritual, but that's by far the most common state of affairs for me. I suppose I am only noticing it now because it contrasts with how deeply I'm involved in community stuff and ritual, which makes me feel somewhat hypocritical. I've been telling everybody else about the importance of repentance and not doing a lot about it myself.

Anyway. There are only a couple of people east of me, so I hope I'm in time to wish everybody an easy fast and a good conclusion.

Whereaboooots: Älvsjö, Stockholm, Sweden
Moooood: anxiousanxious
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livredor: words
Date:September 21st, 2007 04:34 pm (UTC)
21 minutes after journal entry, 04:34 pm (livredor's time)
That's a good question, and a tough one. And yomtov is in 5 minutes so I'm not sure I can give you a very good answer while I swallow a last glass of milk before candles. Sometimes spiritual happens as a result of the process, yes. I think it's a worthwhile thing to do even without that, though, in fact I'm not sure it's not more worthwhile when I'm doing it for the sake of connecting to the community than in order to give myself an experience of religious ecstasy. Spirituality has never really been the point, for me.

Out of time. See you on the other side.
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