• Location: Älvsjö, Stockholm, Sweden
• Mood: nervous
• Music: Mussorgsky: Pictures at an exhibition

Advice sought from people with taste who understand gender

For the first time in my life, I'm dating someone who celebrates Christmas. This means I really ought to get him a Christmas present. I was racking my brain for ideas, when I remembered that the Beau doesn't own a teapot, and it's something of a tradition for me to give my sweeties teapots.

The thing is, last time we discussed teapots, cartesiandaemon said that he wanted a teapot that is manly but not too boring. But I have no idea what makes a teapot masculine; ok, I can probably guess that it shouldn't be covered in roses or fairies, but I probably wouldn't choose that sort of design anyway. I wonder if something from Bodum might work? Any suggestions, anyone?

(Yes, cartesiandaemon can see this post; we agreed that it's better to do away with surprises and therefore avoiding the risk of choosing something inappropriate for whatever reason. I know what he plans to get me, and it's very cool, so I need something equally romantic.)

I'm also somewhat nervous about going to his family for Christmas. Partly because I'm a little clueless about Christmas, but I probably do know more than I think I do from books and media and celebrating Christmas at school and work and general culture. But mainly because it feels like such a serious relationship step! I mean, cartesiandaemon came to us for Passover and met my whole family at once, which is probably far more scary, especially as we'd only been going out a few weeks by then, and he didn't complain about it at all. I have it in my head that Passover is a hospitality thing, but Christmas is a family thing. I am sure it will be fine, but if anyone would like to give me any tips or reassurances for dealing with being a guest at a partner's family Christmas, I would appreciate.